Body Image and Self-Worth: Take Charge of How You See Yourself!
Statistics about how people view their bodies are heartbreaking! According to the NOW Foundation (National Organization for Women Foundation), “53% of American girls are 'unhappy with their bodies.' This grows to 78% by the time girls reach seventeen.” Body dissatisfaction is not only observed in women, it is a struggle for all genders. Additionally, the diet industry makes over $70 billion yearly in America and over $270 billion worldwide, and these numbers are steadily rising. Although we know there are many other contributing factors to the development of disordered eating and eating disorders, it is no wonder the prevalence is so high in our culture!
The way we view ourselves changes over time. Have you seen a young child grinning from ear to ear as they admire their outfit and reflection in the mirror? Maybe you can remember feeling this way about yourself early in life. Sadly, at some point, so many of us are negatively impacted by unrealistic “beauty ideals” and messages we receive about how we are "supposed' to be from other people. These spoken or unspoken messages about our appearance and how we are “supposed” to be “different” ultimately damage our self-worth, and faulty beliefs can develop about WHO we are.
In the busyness of life, it is easy for our mental health to take a backseat. Critical thoughts about outer appearance can lead to faulty beliefs about self-worth. Left unchallenged, these harmful beliefs about WHO we are can fuel maladaptive behaviors, including disordered eating, self-harm, and substance use/abuse. Sometimes, because of a mental health disorder, such as an eating disorder or body dysmorphia, someone does not see themselves accurately, even as other people see them. If you are struggling with body image and self-worth in a way that impacts your ability to live a joy-filled life, I urge you to seek the assistance of a counselor who can help you sort through beliefs about yourself and build skills that can help you heal. Manna would love to walk alongside you on this journey!
At Manna, we teach a variety of approaches and skills to combat poor body image and low self-worth. Here are a few examples of effective tools:
★ Challenge the concept of an “ideal beauty standard”. Remind yourself that this “standard” has changed dramatically, over and over again, throughout history. If we take a snapshot of one particular time period, any beauty “standard” is subjective, as it differs depending on which group of people we ask. Even within the same culture, ideas about “beauty” can vary drastically.
★ Determine whether you have beliefs about how you “should” look or be “different”? Examine the messages you have chosen to believe about yourself, where these messages have come from, and decide which are beneficial and which need to be challenged/discarded. A counselor can help you use Cognitive Behavioral Therapy to dig deeper to find the core beliefs you have about your worth and challenge them with truth.
★ Set boundaries in the areas where you are receiving negative messages about body image and self-worth. For instance, boundaries are necessary with people who are critical of you. Boundaries in other areas, such as social media, may also be needed.
★ Make a function and gratitude list. If you struggle with body image related to a specific body part, write down all the reasons you are thankful for the functionality of that part of your body. For example, if you do not like the size of your legs, remind yourself of the purpose of your legs and write down all of the things you enjoy doing with your legs (e.g. walking, hiking, riding a bike, snow skiing).
★ Give yourself grace, as thoughts and beliefs about yourself will not change overnight. Just as it takes time for negative body image and poor self-worth to develop, it takes time to challenge and replace the messages that are causing distress and to notice body image and self-worth improving.
The reason I am so passionate about helping others with body image and self-worth is because I have experienced the freedom and joy that result from working through my own challenges in these areas. It is my absolute joy to teach others how to love themselves for who they truly are, instead of holding onto beliefs that degrade their worth.
I work with clients of all faith backgrounds, including clients who do not believe in God. Since I am a Christian, I choose to challenge my own faulty beliefs (LIES) with the way I believe God sees me (TRUTH). Examples of my truth statements are:
• My Heavenly Father created me exactly as I am supposed to be, including my physical body and inner characteristics.
• I am valued by God, despite my many mistakes and imperfections.
• I am accepted, loved, and ENOUGH, just as I am.
Struggles with body image and self-worth do not need to continue to derail your joy, and it IS possible to learn to believe the truth about yourself. You are uniquely amazing!
Christie Payne, LPC RD LD
